Reflections

It didn’t take completing a love language quiz to find out that I’m a “words of affirmation” girl, but it sure did make me feel affirmed seeing it in writing.

In strangely related news, I gave up the Facebook app on my phone. I know what you must be thinking, but it’s OK.

Seriously.

The sky has not fallen.
The world has not stopped spinning.
My friends have not unfriended me.

I still have Twitter.

But Facebook had to go for many reasons.

First, I realized that it is primarily a land whose commodity is time suckage. Where did that hour go? Oh, I spent it on Facebook watching endless videos of cats and dogs; staring at pictures of other peoples’ relatives; and fervently reading about what someone had for lunch.

Second, I noticed that I visited this strange land during lulls in my day for no reason other than because I could. It was instant pacification when a meeting became unriveting, a stop light interrupted my progress, or a commercial reared it’s ugly head.

Third, it started to feel a little too good when someone liked my post. Those little badges of affirmation (or lack thereof) following a status update made me smile (or un-smile) a little too often.

Which brings me to the point of this post.

Recently, I noticed that people were not liking some of my statuses. I couldn’t figure out why. I realize my status updates aren’t life changing, and I might not be as hilarious as I think I am, but my friends are usually pretty amazing in showing support (or perhaps pity) by liking at least some of them.

It didn’t bother me at first, but I was bumfuddled because some were globally like-able.

Like an Oswald Chambers quote. I mean, who doesn’t like some Oz?

Or a bible verse. At least one person has got to “like” Jesus, right?

Or a picture of Ellie.  I mean, who can’t like a face like this?

But nothing.
Zero.
Nada.

Deafening silence on the likability scale.

For weeks.

The words of affirmation girl was crying out, and I didn’t like it. (See what I did there?) Inside she was screaming:

Like me!
Like me!
Like meeeee!

Then, a little truth showed up.

A co-worker was trying to find a link I’d posted on Facebook. No matter how many times she refreshed her screen she still couldn’t see the link on my page. I showed her on my phone where I had posted it, but when we compared views of my page, the link clearly was not there on her phone nor were many, many of my previous posts.

Turns out, anything I posted to Facebook via Twitter was hidden from sight because somehow a setting had changed from “Public” to view by “Only Me.”

I giggled as I heard God explain: Things aren’t always what they seem, Nikol.

I assumed people could see things, when in fact, they could not.
I mistook silence for rejection.

How often are we the same in our relationship with God?

When God is silent, we think He’s left us.
When prayers go seemingly unanswered, we assume He doesn’t care.
When progress is painfully slow, we think He’s not moving.

These are lies.

All of them.

God will never leave us even when we do not sense Him.
God is good even when things seem bad.
God is working even when we do not perceive Him.

Things aren’t always what they seem.